Archive for December, 2009
Here is something I get asked about from time to time:
What if you have teenaged children that live in your home and their room is a disaster – perhaps there are clothes all over the place, or the room is cluttered and generally in a messy state. If you are trying to clear clutter in the rest of your home, what do you do about your teenager’s room?
The answer may be difficult to hear, but it’s important!
Teenagers are hormonally going through great change. They are also going through a lot of growth and development.
I have read that going through the teen years is the same level and intensity as a two year old. The difference with teenagers is that you add the hormones to the list, and things can become very erratic. Often it’s chaos inside theem, and as we know, the outer world mirrors their inner world, and so it makes sense then that their outer world, their room, is going to reflect their inner turmoil.
I have two teenage daughters and one teenage son. I know this room! In that instance, it is important to recognize that they need their space to move through their own development. Try not to focus too much on it when it’s a teenager.
Of course, it’s still your home, but my advice is to treat that space as a separate apartment in your home. Close the door to that space and focus on your main living area; where you spend your time.
It sounds unusual, but in the case of a teenager, it’s the best way to handle it. The good news is they will come out of it ... the light will come on and the child you knew will pop back into their body. As odd as that sounds, it really is just that way.
Remember also that we all move at our own pace. This teenaged phase may go from early teens to late twenties. If it goes further than that, then perhaps there is a block that you need to help them identify.
When they are changing so fast, it’s not that easy for them to keep up with themselves. Their outer world, their room, their environment, will probably reflect this. It’s their space where they are trying to define themselves.
To learn more about how to use Feng Shui principles to manage your relationships, listen to my podcast here.
© 2009 Harmony Life, LLC by Laurie Bornstein
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE, BLOG OR WEB SITE?
You can, as long as you include the copyright and the following information:
Feng Shui Teacher, Designer and Entrepreneur Laurie Bornstein, is the author and creator of ‘Feng Shui Lifestyle’, her FREE monthly ezine filled with Feng Shui and Lifestyle Marketing articles and tips, empowering and inspiring you to live and work in comfort, balance and harmony.
Visit http://www.harmonylifedesign.com to learn more.
In order to attract the perfect relationship, you need to be sure that your living environment embraces you with comfort and warmth and welcome.
If your love relationship space is your bedroom, and there are clothes all over the floor or if your bed is always a mess, then you probably cringe when you look at it. If it involves too much work in order to make it comfortable, perhaps you would rather go to other parts of your house than go to that space.
It depends where you are in your life, relationship-wise, but essentially when we speak about a love relationship, we are not referring to a spring fling; we are referring to something more. We want to attract a relationship that brings us a sense of belonging, a sense of being cared for.
In Feng Shui, your inner world is mirrored by your outer world. So the question is, how do you treat yourself? Do you treat yourself with love and compassion? Do you treat yourself well? Do you take care of your space? If clutter is an issue for you, then the answer is ‘not really’.
When we talk about our desires, sometimes we may forget that our surroundings mirror what we think about and what is actually happening in our lives. Our space speaks volumes about what is going on within us.
Clutter does not have to mean ‘messy’. The definition of what clutter is may be different for all of us. The question to ask yourself is whether you are compelled – does it move you forward? In the case of a bedroom, the space should be so yummy and delicious that when you wake up in the morning, you should see something beautiful. You should want to snuggle down and not get out of bed because it’s so comfy. That is a space that is not cluttered.
There may still be things in it because you live there, but it should be comfy. If you are indifferent about it; if there are things scattered, clothes on a chair, a duvet on the end of the bed. If you get a negative feeling about it or you don’t want to go there, that is the feeling that clutter produces – it repels us. We try to avoid it. Drudgery is a job waiting to be done. A lived-in spaced isn’t cluttered, but what that means is going to be different for me than it is for you
It is important to recognize how it makes you feel. Do you feel nurtured or does it replenish and uplift you or does it drain you of energy?
By recognizing what feels good in our space, and by making sure that we surround ourselves with things that we love, we focus on treating ourselves with love and compassion. Getting our own environment in order is important to do before trying to attract anyone new into our lives.
For more information about how to treat yourself, click here to listen to my podcast on Feng Shui and Romantic Life.
© 2009 Harmony Life, LLC by Laurie Bornstein
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE, BLOG OR WEB SITE?
You can, as long as you include the copyright and the following information:
Feng Shui Teacher, Designer and Entrepreneur Laurie Bornstein, is the author and creator of ‘Feng Shui Lifestyle’, her FREE monthly ezine filled with Feng Shui and Lifestyle Marketing articles and tips, empowering and inspiring you to live and work in comfort, balance and harmony.
Visit http://www.harmonylifedesign.com to learn more.
Could you use more romance in your life? Does your relationship need a jump start? Clutter clearing just might give you the space in your life for love to enter. How? What does clutter clearing have to do with romantic life? It’s all about making space.
I worked with a client once who claimed she was in search of the perfect relationship. When I went into her bedroom, I noticed that her bed was pushed right up against the wall. When I saw that there was no space for someone else, I asked her to tell me about the relationship she wanted. She started to tell me about how busy her life was. She wasn’t sure if she had time for a relationship, but she wanted one.
I pointed out to her that she didn’t seem to have room based on the placement of her bed – literally there was no way for someone else to get in or out of the bed. As we looked around the room, every place had clutter. There was no space anywhere for this relationship that she believed she wanted. She realized that she didn’t actually have space for a man in her life. We needed to clear her clutter in order to make space for any relationship in her life. In almost every room in her house, the love relationship corner had clutter in it.
The love relationship corner from the Bagua map, if you are facing into the room, is in the back right corner. Your home divides into nine areas and that back right corner is your love relationship space.
This may not have been a conscious choice that she made, but we can sometimes create our own blocks. Sometimes we create them because we are not ready; we need more time. Other times it’s just an ingrained habit. We automatically do it and then we wonder why it’s not working.
Feng Shui energy needs space to move. If there is not space, you can want a relationship forever but if you don’t make space for it in your environment and in your heart, it won’t come. Because she said she was so busy, she didn’t even have the time to nurture any relationship that came her way.
When there is a lot of clutter blocking our relationships or our desire for relationships, the first thing we have to do is make time, make space for ourselves. We have to start to care better for ourselves and love ourselves. It’s much easier to make changes in our lives when we feel compelled forward.
To learn more about creating space for love in your life, listen to my podcast on Enhancing Your Romantic Life Using Feng Shui Principles.
© 2009 Harmony Life, LLC by Laurie Bornstein
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE, BLOG OR WEB SITE?
You can, as long as you include the copyright and the following information:
Feng Shui Teacher, Designer and Entrepreneur Laurie Bornstein, is the author and creator of ‘Feng Shui Lifestyle’, her FREE monthly ezine filled with Feng Shui and Lifestyle Marketing articles and tips, empowering and inspiring you to live and work in comfort, balance and harmony.
Visit http://www.harmonylifedesign.com to learn more.
